the cure for what ails me

it always seems that no matter how bad i'm feeling, the one cure all is the ballpark. fresh cut grass, white chalk, the game within the game, the beauty that is baseball. pete rose once said, "i'd walk through hell in a gasoline suit just to play baseball." i went to see the giants play last night at pac bell park and sat with my younger sister and we ate peanuts, and drank sodas, and talked about baseball - it was great.

everytime i go to the ballpark i am reminded of my dad pulling me out of school when i was in 1st grade and taking me to opening day at candlestick because it happened to coincide with my birthday - we ate hot dogs, kept score, and wore our gloves the entire game. it seems that no matter how muddled my relationship with my father is, i always look back at that moment and think fondly of him. my dad is a huge baseball fan and some of the best times we have had together have been combined with baseball - whether it was giants spring training in arizona with he and my grandfather when i was 16 or a AAA game in new orleans for fathers day when i was 21, or any other game i've been to with him. my dad and i have been on rather strenuos terms for a while now for many different reasons - he being in new jersey and me being in san francisco i am sure does not help things.

that poor soul pete rose also said of baseball, "love it hard and it will love you back hard." think the same is true in relationships? maybe me and dad just need to go to a ballgame. . .